The shit that doesn't merit its own thread (the resurrection)

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Potentially ā€˜Samanthaā€™ could finally kill off Mr.MWS. Iā€™ve spoken with him and he seemed nonplussed stating: "I would never touch one of these until they came with Shakti stones as standard and tits filled with lavender honey."
Apparently bespoke ā€˜playmatesā€™ are possible, this seemed to perk him up some although his criteria was worryingly warped: ā€œI want one what doesnā€™t look like Barbie with arthritis. Oh and a vicious growler that can play the recorder, butter toast and feed the cat when I forget.ā€

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Wrists arenā€™t sufficiently arched.

ā€˜nother squeeze of tits might do it.

No, no, no.

Youā€™re mistaking her now with her earlier career when she attempted to impersonate Max Bygraves

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Looks like the guy behind is about to give her a pearl necklace

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That would certainly make your Pyong yang a bit.

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Would that fit the DMZ of the curious gentleman?

Also, why does the Quim Jong Un on the far left look like Shaun Ryder?

I thought more Johny Vegas

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Weapon of Ass Destruction

giphy

Stuff http://www.ingenia.org.uk/Ingenia/Articles/1106

Economically illiterate question for the economically literate:

How much is the Bank of England likely to increase interest rates by and will an increase in BoE interest rates see a better offer in the savings market?

Iā€™d be overjoyed with a 2 or 3% rate on a fixed term savings account.

Iā€™m no economist, but I wouldnā€™t hold your breath

The BoE typically moves in 25 BP increments. I would expect any variable rate debt payments to immediately go up by at least 1/4 of one per cent on announcement of a change in the policy rate. However, I would expect that deposit rates will go up with a lag and by less than the full amount, because this is how Banks now behave.

Iā€™m unconvinced that rates will rise in the period before Xmas although the BoE may have no choice. A lot of the current inflation has been imported via the weaker pound. Talking tougher usually causes sterling to strengthen, but further weakening of sterling in the light of Brexit/Govt wobbles will almost certainly lead to an increase in interest rates.

Given that nominal fixed term deposit rates are currently 1.7-2.1% ish with decent lenders for 3-5 years so that you are making at best a small loss in real terms, I cannot see 3% for a long while unless you are taking on risk or very long maturities AND the shit really hits the fan. One-year yields are so poor relative to inflation that you may as well not bother.

Paying off debt or taking on risk is the better option in my view but Iā€™ve not looked at the UK market much at all. The names showing >1.5% for a one-year deposit on the www would not get my money as they have horrendous risk profiles. I invest my surplus income overseas as I am unlikely to retire in the UK and have my assets in Oz for historical reasons. I am only buying pension credits here.

I think Iā€™d invest in peer to peer lending if I had paid off my mortgage. Thatā€™s not exactly imminent though :unamused:

Iā€™m of the opinion that is too risky for the level of return. Other than my UK pension which is too exposed to the UK in its focus for my liking, we are in various tracking funds none of which are based in the UK or track UK securities and have capital in a fund that I advise/work for/am a partner in.

Insider dealing, capitalist cunt (in the nicest possible way :slightly_smiling_face: ).

Thanks Olan. I think I understand most of this.

Itā€™s unlikely there will be any great leap in BoE interest rates, a nudge upwards if anything, depending on the valuation of the pound - and I should continue to remember fondly savings rates of yore because those rates, even after years of derisory terms for savers, are unlikely to improve anytime soon. I have looked at risk investment but given post-brexit uncertainties they bother me.

Which means I can either sit on what cash I have and watch it devalue or spunk a chunk on vintage guitars which have been increasing in value. :thinking:

:+1:

Cheeky fucker. We donā€™t trade firm level securities so insider dealing is not on. In fact we mainly trade volatility when we trade. Mostly we buy and hold for veeeery long periods of time as we hate paying brokers.

Just leave it at greedy cunt, OK?