Please… no more mention of HFS forum here. 
Jesus Horatio Christ! How does such a fussy little bitch get so fucking FAT!?
1 Like
1 Like
Oh yes, make no bones about it, I’m a fat cunt - but no small part of that is eating anything that holds still long enough!
4 Likes
Dealing with the consequences of a fall. 10:30 last night I tripped over a box file in the study and fell on my hands and knees. It would have been no big deal except that I had a wine glass in my right hand. Which smashed in my tightening grip. Then I had a wine glass in my right hand rather too literally. Pricey taxi to the John Radcliffe, trying not to make the rear seats look too much like Pulp Fiction. Had the cut across the pad at the base of my right forefinger swilled out by triage nurse (Irish, lovely). Put in (short) queue for doctor’s assessment. He says it’s too wide and way too deep to glue so he washes all the clots out, anaesthetises it (in that order 
) and inserts three stitches. Equally pricey taxi ride home (at least the local taxi firm are still talking to me after the blood the first time). Now looking at getting a handful of blood out of a plain beige carpet. Fortunately most seems to have dried in biggish lumps on the surface and might just chip off. Damn. Plus in the first few seconds after I did it I realised I no longer had any sensation up the outside of the finger beyond the first knuckle.
VB
Ouch Graeme. How’s it feeling this morning?
Sore. Except the outside of the finger, which still feels like it’s someone else’s. Otherwise OK thanks. I’ve had worse. Jack’s bust bone felt worse even just looking at the X-ray.
VB
Doing a similar thing at 16, cutting my hand and spraying blood everywhere, and realising I have all the squeamishness of Doc Martin, put paid to any ideas of a glittering career in surgery!
Hope it heals up quickly, those amps aren’t going to fix themselves 
1 Like
Ouch - sorry to hear that Graeme.
Be prepared for a load of unfunny jokes about one-handed typing.
1 Like
Ow!! Hope you haven’t severed anything, and that it heals quickly.
1 Like
Graeme, Graeme, Graeme…you’re normally such a clever and sensible bloke - wtf is a box file doing on the floor?
Trips and falls are the most common type of accident at home…you know everything, so you must know this!
Hope it’s feeling better soon, (although you’re not the first on here to be digitally compromised 
)
1 Like
Oh bloody hell 
, hope you get sorted ok!
1 Like
Ouch! Hope you haven’t done any permanent severing Graeme.
1 Like
Yes ouch -Speedy recovery
1 Like
There’s quite a lot of stuff on my floors I’m afraid Jim and the study is a bit of an obstacle course. I’ve moved the box file. The sad thing was that that was only the second glass of wine yesterday, and on school nights I stick to 125ml glasses. So I don’t even have the affluence of incohol excuse. It was just my dumb fault 
.
Me too. It looked deep enough though, at least to my inexpert eye 
.
VB
1 Like
Ouch ! Hope it gets better quickly Graeme.
In the meantime, you have two issues to deal with. One, holding a wine glass, and two, maintaining balance whilst on the go and having some refreshment. I recommend the product below. No need to hold a glass, just suck on the tubes. And no more misery trying to decide whether to have red or white. Have both !
5 Likes
Ouch! Let’s hope it’s just a flesh wound…
3 Likes
oops I hope it heals quickly. I will not bore you with my slicing my arse cheek open in a hotel bath/shower thing…
1 Like
Ooh, nasty. Hope it heals quickly, Graeme.
1 Like