Yet another thread for the purposes of awarding a cockpunch

Jesus, all this tea fail is making me question whether I really belong here.

OK, I don’t really belong anywhere. You’re fucking stuck with me, regardless.

But seriously, get a grip with the tea shit.

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You want tea, you got tea…

Edit: I suddenly feel a totally inexplicable urge to hear this album.

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You object to tea but not HCBs?

No, I object to tea that looks like pea soup with a vagina inscribed in it.

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Now this is spooky:

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Robert Johnson was not the only one to do a deal at the crossroads…

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I think this will be more your cup of tea.

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Indeed. Skilfully done.

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Fucking property laws in this country can have a bid mallet to the gonads - bastid buyers of our house have just pulled out. We were due to exchange contracts next week and only yesterday I put down a NON FUCKING REFUNDABLE deposit on a rental. Their fucking solicitor was only asking final questions this morning. Cunts. Fucking livid here.

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Property laws in the country are absolutely criminally stupid. How they have remained in place this long, astounds me.

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Sadly there will always be a moment in any contract process when, as the lawyers say, the contract is ‘formed’. Before that moment there is no contract. None at all. After it there is. So there will always be another moment 5 minutes before the contract is formed when one of the parties can walk away. It is extremely annoying when they do (voice of bloody experience speaking here). But shifting the contract formation point to another time in the process just shifts the walking-away-with-5-minutes-to-go-thereby-causing-complete-outrage time too. The plain fact is that it isn’t sold until it’s sold. Then it is (or at least you get to keep the deposit).

VB

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Sorry to hear that Dave. I feel your pain.

One of the few things the Strayans have got right, and particularly the Victorians is the way property sells. Most houses in Melbourne are auctioned. The auction season runs through the spring and early summer. You gather outside the house, the auction happens (very good street theatre), you bid and if you win you sign a contract with a specified settlement period. On settlement day, you pay the balance or risk loss of the deposit and the vendor must vacate the house. There is no chain.

In our second house in Melbourne, the vendor’s bank couldn’t find the title deeds so the vendor (or rather his bank) was liable for our costs as settlement couldn’t occur. We had 10 days in a nice apartment in Apollo Bay on the Great Ocean Road at their expense.

The current situation in the UK is an absolute joke.

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Wow, really ? It sounds like the process has a kind of medieval/wild-west charm. But the idea of the house going for 50k less than it should because the potential top bidder got stuck at the airport, or his phone battery went dead if that’s how he was bidding, suggests that a bit more grown-upness might be a good idea.

VB

We are in process of selling and it is just a month to planned exchange of contracts.
There has been some traffic regarding lack of building regs certification for changing the garage to a room.
Hopefully that will not turn up into a big snag. Also there is something of a chain downstream.

The buyers are visiting yet again tomorrow for more measuring up so we will have a chance to look them in the eye. I remain on the pessimistic side and will be until exchange happens

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Straya?

medieval = Yes
wild west = Yes
charm = get to fuck

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Yes sorry to hear of this -It seems all too frequent

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Good. I really hope it works out (it very often does, of course).

VB

Nope, the reserve is never, ever revealed. So as a seller, if you don’t like the price, you pass it in and sell in negotiation afterwards. There are all sorts of underhand tricks that go on (dummy bids, vendor stooges etc). It is just a faster way to sell and usually to get the best price. Very Wild West.

Works for Southampton too! :smiley:

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There is an easy, fair, way to do this.
You give the buyer the room for all the legal, surveyor, and necessaries, to be done.
When the buyer is satisfied, and says “I will buy it”, and seller accepts, the process goes to escrow.
The escrow amount is say 5% of the purchase price.
Both the buyer and the seller put said amount into escrow. If either party backs out of the deal, they lose their escrow deposit. Done!
That will stop gazumping, changing your mind at the last minute.

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Assuming both parties have access to that sort of cash