Yet another thread for the purposes of awarding a cockpunch

A very very kind landlord. I’m astounded.

So was I. It was a private rent and she could have said tough, but she didn’t . And for that I’m very thankful. There are some decent people in this world - it goes someway to balance the cuntishness of the rest of the cunt brigade

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Multiple cockpunches required

  1. Alvin Carpio for starting such a wanky petition (and having a stupid fucking name)
  2. The 12,000 people who have signed it
  3. change.org for sending me an email every time some fucking retard starts a stupid fucking petition
  4. any cunt who gives one minute fuck about faecesbook.

https://www.change.org/p/hold-facebook-to-account-talktousmark

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I like this. Decent cunts and cunt cunts.

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Remember kids, if you port your mobile number make sure you’ve unlocked your handset beforehand.

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I am a professional.

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ahahahahaha and Change.org ain’t mining their data at all, nope sireee,. Oh the fucking irony. Apart from which it’s fucking useless and does nothiing other than make the owners some wonga.

The pillock who set up the Virgin One Account’s standing order creation system. As far as I can tell it is not actually possible to get it to make a fixed number of monthly payments, the first of which is different from all of the others.

The nearest you can get is to set up an endless series of monthly payments (amount, first date, frequency) and then bring these to a stop by entering, in a different set of boxes, a final payment. When you do this it will indeed stop the regular payments on the date you enter. But it treats the final payment as an additional one, so the money goes out twice that month. There is yet another set of boxes for the first payment. Amount and first date are obvious. But frequency ? How often would you like to make the first payment ? The (blindingly obvious) answer is ‘Once - there can only be one first payment you pillock’. But that is not an option. So you choose ‘monthly’ because it is the first of a sequence of monthly payments. The system then proceeds to make this payment every month, alongside the regular payments that you actually want it to make every month.

There is a fix for this balls-up. You can send the One Account a PM explaining what you (obviously) want and some backroom flunky will then edit the payments to match what you (obviously) want. This has been going on for years (each time the Council Tax is due). Every year I PM them. Every year they hack it into shape. They never just make the obvious fix to their system.

VB

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People who come in to the dog room in the pub, order food and then mutter, in clearly audible stage whispers, about the fact that there are 4 dogs staring at them, with added drool (and whining, because we’ve had to put the dogs on their leads instead of it being a joyous free for all). This despite the fact that there is a sign on the door that says “Dog Room”, it is by far the shittiest room in the pub and there is plenty of room in the nicer dining areas of the pub. Fucking idiots.

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Why would you not pay council tax by direct debit?

For added idiocy, First Direct’s online payment system doesn’t allow Warwick Council’s reference format for Council Tax.

Absolutely this.

I haven’t had to change anything in years, the council just takes the council tax monthly by DD without any issues.

Force of habit. We had a bad experience with direct debit a long time ago and since then we don’t use it unless there really is no alternative or unless there is a really significant incentive. Honestly I don’t want to sound arrogant, but broadly speaking my experience is that I screw things up less often than the average person screws things up. Next door to me is an arts centre which is leased from my district council by a group of volunteers. As the neighbour I’ve been going to their committee meetings. I’ve seen first-hand how piss-poor the council is at collecting the lease payments they’re owed. You’d be asking me to let the same organisation put their hands into my wallet. Looking at council tax specifically, this year either the council or the banks have screwed up so badly that at least some of the banks have ended up with the wrong sort code for the council’s account in their system. That’s why I had to set the standing order up manually in the first place. I accept that a DD might work fine most of the time. But an SO works fine all of the time.

VB

Except when they keep taking your “initial” payment or double dipping?

Which they don’t. Because I tell them not to. That’s precisely my point. I moan about having to do their job for them. You’re suggesting that I hand the job to the people who repeatedly screw up.

VB

Not suggesting anything but you’ve just CP’d your bank for having a shit SO interface and then said it never goes wrong.

If I was going to suggest anything it would be to just switch to a non shit bank.

Strictly speaking the SO payments have never gone wrong once I’ve battled my way past the poxy interface and got to a human being. It’s 10-20 minutes work once a year. The last time I wanted to open another bank account it took a lot longer than that.

VB

So not really cockpunch material then :smirk:

Even tiny things done really badly piss me off (I admit this may well be a personality defect). A stubborn refusal ever to put them right just makes it worse. Good heavens there are people on here who have the milk and the teabag in their mug at the same time ! That pisses me off and given the choice I don’t even drink tea !

VB

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