[quote=“A_Touch_of_Cloth, post:1441, topic:85”]
I am now an irritating bell end[/quote]
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I’ll bet you smell like a pox doctors clerk though
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A pox doctor, that ages you.
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Yep. Nowt much I can do about that though 
Banjoo and accordion duo from the 70’s??? I quite liked their concept album ‘A voyage to Bell’s End’.
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Although i enjoyed Lily & Rose’s version,i preferred B52s version of Pox Doctor.
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it’s plastic balls, bad for the environment and bell ends.
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He’s got a ball bearing foreskin now, friction free drawback, no lube required.
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Claire was meant to be making dinner tonight. Nothing special, stir fry chicken kung po, using a sachet sauce.
However she was on autopilot and put the chicken in the freezer, and then fell asleep on the sofa until I woke her up just now and demanded sustenance…
The Just Eat app is very handy…
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Seamus Coleman.
I think he’d prefer a punch in the knackers to having tib and fib bent sideways.
Is this referring to anyone in particular, or just generally aspirational?
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Jesus the cunting clocks can have one for reducing my drunken sleep by an hour. Who knew?
I did.
Started drinking an hour earlier.
Seemed a good plan at the time…
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Coalition forces bombarding embedded rebels in Mosul, causing hundreds of civilian deaths and then pretending it’s somehow different to what Syria & the Russians were doing in Aleppo.
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They’ll be those special well intentioned bombs then.
Yes those will be the ones. Far less deadly and more people friendly than the evocatively named ‘barrel’ bombs that Assad was using. It’ll be of some comfort for bereaved parents to know their child was killed by a nice bomb rather than an uncaring barrel bomb.
Constipationnnnnnnnnnnnnnn can have one.
Got to pick the mum in law up for a roast in half an hour. Looking like I am going to be sliiiiiiiiiightly late. 
Don’t want to put thoughts into your head.
But you will be bursting as soon as she gets in the car,have you a spare bucket?
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Get your Mrs to stick a funnel up yer bum and pour warmish water down it. She should then stand well back.