Yet another thread for the purposes of awarding a cockpunch


People (cunts), that when asked a relatively straightforward question think they are cutting edge and reply with “… is your friend”.

Off tae fuck you go.

If only there was a mechanism to allow me to pass through walls…“the door is your friend”. Fuck you.

I really would like to set fire to my speakers…“Richard Dung is your friend”.

There are too many cockpunches required in that last sentence to even be viable. :frowning:

What time is it? “The clock is your friend”.



calmness is your friend



friend fixt


Cooking chips?




It is moments like these that make me pleased I can spell schadenfreude. :smirk:


Wasn’t he playing for Monako tonight


You need the Shit Joke and humour toilet thread there my friend.


…exit stage left…


What with the sacking of Kelvin and the clearout of all the equally offensive Fox News types anyone would think the 'ole Muckspreader was trying to persuade OFCOM he is a suitable future owner of Sky.


How long is it since the Dirty Digger got a nomination in this thread? CP to the lot of us for a lack of diligence…


The fucker will get away with it too. The lawyer acting on behalf of 29 ex Fox employees is in with OFCOM today but I imagine Mudcocks wallet is bigger than their stories of misery.


My fucking sat nav can have one. Just paid £30 penalty notice after it took me down a bus lane in Wolverhampton last week.

I’ll take one as well though for not seeing what in retrospect were bleeding big signs telling me of said bus lane.


Consider yourself well and truly cuntpunched…


I was saying to someone the other day that I’m seeing women drivers becoming much more aggressive on the road.

As I live about 300m from a very large school I’ve noticed being tailgated by mums in the morning because I’m doing 20 past the school and stick to 30 in a 30.

Can’t believe she is also pregnant, what a fucking psycho hosebeast.


I can. I expect she thought she was less likely to go to prison if she got herself knocked up.


The cynic in me says the same thing




Punch in the cock for the so called Mortgage Broker I am using.

  1. Gets the fucking wrong date on the re-mortgage, thus costing me £150 in extra interest.
  2. For calculating the wrong amount on the re-mortgage, so I now have to come up with an additional £1,760 in cash on Monday.

Comes at the wrong time after giving my eldest £800 to go to the USA to go to job interviews. And £200 to my second daughter for a trailer test.


Love the way he has a go at the train :smiley: