Stopped at a bakers in Kingsbridge to emerge with high hopes. Toasting this evening the balloon began to deflate… The first step in sampling is to ‘sniff & squeeze the bun’ the second, to cut the bun’ ‘the third inspect fruiting and bake quality’. The fourth step is vital, room aromatics when toasting - it was here, poised for a holy moment, I realized the bun was damned… The bastard things were barely spiced, sure I performed step one - I hoofed the thing most thoroughly but it’s really only on toasting the true caliber is shown and this fucker was one down from a pea shooter… I had previously deducted a point for fruiting which seemed sparse enough to qualify as mean but spicing, fucking spicing is everything and this bun had close to nothing.
Dejected I didn’t bother with the usual 10mm slab of butter - These were undeserving - I’m not sure I want to live in a world where bakers can’t even produce a plump fruited well spiced bun - I could say it’s civilization in reverse - but cunts cooking with coal ovens 200 years ago could get it right and that was at a time where spice was sparse… I suspect this years woeful display ici is nothing more than a reflection of a depressed island - Roll on Prozac bunz.(Well spiced if you don’t mind)
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You do find the BEST conniption fuel - chapeau, mon brave!! 
Match my coat cheddar
Bring it! 
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First prove done, now they’re going somewhere warm for another hour or so to prove again before baking:
It looks like some buns are going to be more - err - equal than others, so they go in the corners to ensure no gaps when I put the crosses on
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We need pagan symbols not boring old crosses.
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Bit trickier but worth it.
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Hmmm…
Horned God?
Don’t listen to those voices,
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Some of those would fit pretty well on a Heston-esque blue cheese and marmite monstrosity, but we want none of that tomfoolery around here, thank you very much!
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Thank god for you templars
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Hard not to declare an epic win here 
Considerable envy…
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To be fair, the commercial options here are very few and far between, and the specialist bakers we’ve found are French or German, so we’ve had to press on with the home-brew version or do without, which would be unthinkable
The recipe is from the Fabulous Baker Brothers - seems surprisingly (to me 
) foolproof, so long as you follow closely on qty, method etc. PM me if you’d like a copy 
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