Covfaffe - the road to despair, calling at futility and disappointment

It can be and that a lot can depend on the roaster. The sample roaster linked to earlier appears to show a roaster that can have a roasting profile programmed in, and yes there in lies the rabbit hole to run down and get lost in.

My roaster is ok, but in terms of its controls at its price point, you cannot really programme in a roast profile as such. You set the temperature and the duration, and off it goes. You can profile the roast by switching the things on and off manually, but it isn’t how the machine is meant to do stuff. It produces good coffee with makes nice drinks, but it doesn’t have the precision and accuracy of more expensive machines…….much less a rabbit hole.

The sample roaster looks nice, but only 60g a time…we roast 250g once per week, and that is time consuming enough.

In the context of this thread, I find this statement both surprising and hilarious.


anyone going to the London Covfaffe Festival in hipster Brick Lane

I may well go this year, one of my colleagues went last and really enjoyed it.

Caravan release a series of 9 coffees to coincide with the festival and last year I discovered them too late. One of them I did get was really something but apparently there were others that were even better which sold out quickly. I’ve resolved to get in tbere quick this time.

At the other end of the spectrum, ten days staying with my brother and his Aeropress has completely ruined cafetiere coffee for me. All I can taste is the acidity now that I’m back home. Good job I’ve got a birthday coming up.

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What are you trying to say?

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That my coffee making skills are shit

Well, at least give your skills a chance with something that actually makes decent coffee. I go somewhere and am confronted by a cafetiere, and a little part of my soul dies…

people over on Coffee Forums moaning about how busy it gets and that it could take 10-15 mins of queueing to get to a stand…

Lol, the Alton Towers of coffee. Have they got a FastPass wristband?

Order your coffee via an app. They can start making it and by the time you’ve made it to the front of the queue, it’ll only be another half an hour before it’s ready. If you’re lucky.


Once you’ve ordered your coffee put Tales from Topographic Oceans on Spotify. You’ll be on your 3rd cup before the first side has finished.


I hate you lot :unamused:



Are you following some sort of faff routine? If so, keep everything the same but make your grind a little finer. If not… :grinning:

I’m using pre-ground…




I stayed in that hotel :frowning_face:

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