Fatberg of utter drivel and fekin' fish puns a.k.a Jim's jokes (Part 1)

I assume it’s an implied margin of statistical uncertainty. Wise, if probably unwarranted.

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Politicians by definition are sociopathic cunts. They should all be boiled alive in their own effluent.

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Too quick and a waste of energy…

I would prefer if they were allowed to slowly dissolve in their own effluent while being attacked by wasps and nibbled on by hungry chimps.

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CAUTION: Drummer joke…

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image

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Next time you take in a novel and expansive cocktail of pharmaceuticals, please buy vinyl and leave facebook shut.

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:face_with_monocle:

This is too good for here…

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Blind man walks into a pub and starts swinging his guide dog around on its lead.

The barman goes nuts and asks what the hell he’s doing

He says “Just having a look around.”

Coat, etc.

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My last girlfriend broke up with me when she found out I only had nine toes.

She was lack-toes intolerant.

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My last girlfriend was an English teacher. She binned me off for improper use of the colon.

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fashion-police-cat-hates-your-shoe

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Not doing Halloween this year, went to a party last year dressed as a Harp, this guy said to me

‘you’re too small to be a Harp’

I said are you calling me a Lyre?

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