Roll up.........Roll up

Welcome to Audio Abattoirs very own Flounce Emporium where you will find and buy your very own pre-packaged Flounce.

Each pre-packaged Flounce is lovingly crafted to ensure the Flouncee escapes the gentle ribbing that previous flounces have had to endure.

All Flounces are hermetically sealed in a beige bag apart from our De-Lux Flounce-O-Matic plus version which is delivered in an extremely elegant, yet hard wearing and teardrop resistant, ladies handbag. This version also comes supplied with the inference that the place you are leaving could have been so much better had you not been made to Flounce in the first place. Market research has shown that this is particularly popular among Flouncees that have had little input into the place they wish to noisily remove themselves from. De-Lux also come complete with auto-thread-lock technology.

Fuck…I’m boring myself now but you get the gist.




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He is still here or hereabouts…I can detect a subtle whiff of lavender… :slight_smile:


The real mystery is where anyone finds flounceworthy material in this barren wilderness.

Do my strong views on the merits of allotments expose the forum to risk here?

Similarly, if my recent inference that chickens should be taught to make pizza caused offence, I am happy to retract.

I like a good flounce though. Haven’t seen a proper one for ages.

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Can I get a flounce out of this?

Probably not, as I’m a grammar pedant myself.

It’s the proverbial flounce in an (almost) empty room.

Those are the really special ones.

Can you elaborate?

Fuck You!! There are no fucking diamante sparkles on the handbag!! You are doing this to annoy me aren’t you? Well you can just shove this sub-standard flounce-pouch in your shit-bucket you bullying bastard! I’ve had it, I’m off.

<30 second break>

I’m back again. Are there ruffles on the bag? I may be having second thoughts…is the flounce-o-matic shiny?


Sorry, but that was a pathetic excuse for a flounce.

Woefully lacking in every department.

And you came back far too quickly. I just didn’t get any sense of hammed up melodrama. The righteous butthurt aspects need intensive remedial work, too.

I’ll give it a (generous) 3 out of 10.


Try again, this time with feeling.

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I’ll flounce how I want and with as little or as much drama as I want.

I might flounce from a forum I don’t contribute to for specious reasons to get a bit of practice in first though.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot, stop bullying me @horace or I shall hold my breath until I am sick.


Fucking amateurs…

Here, the flouncers’ mantra could be, “I flounce, therefore I Wam…”


Tough crowd here on AA - it would take an almighty flounce to cut through the cynicism.

In fact, you could close your flounce with a live video feed of self immolation and the best you’d get here would be ‘meh’.

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Prior to my flounce I am going to sell all my kit and buy something off this list. I expect to have 13p change once the wheeling and dealing is done. Can somebody lend me £20 for the Classifieds please?

Keep the 13p. You’ll need it for a new needle

Fuk this schitt, my first post, and im fukin out of here…