Slaughterman SOS - Another car thread

The ‘Man Mule’s’ mind struggles to navigate from one side of a corridor to another, he is quite allergic to the highway or any code come to mention it. Banned from all supermarkets for crimes against shopping trolleys he becomes quite aroused at the slightest glimpse of them. Physically he has but one damned red eye - I wouldn’t wager for it’s function but he often forgets to duck and has an an uncanny ability to ‘make whoopee’ with inanimate objects whilst screaming ‘Eloá’ (From what I can gather this was the name of a three legged mongrel in the Favela) If lesser men had the choice between Stronzetto as their driver and the exhumed remains of Shergar, most would plump for the nag.
Driven by the winds of faith and fortune (a stroppy set of beauties at the best of times) Mr. MWS stands by his charge, fearless and resolute.


Toyota Land Cruiser. Best car/truck I’ve ever owned. P plate on mine and bought it with 120k on the clock. Now up to 180k after 5 years. Standard annual service every year and only had to buy 2 front tyres and new wiper blades in 5 years. Thing is indestructible.


Buy Japanese. You can afford to spec them up, unlike German cars, and they are reliable. Korean might be the same, not found out yet.

I put on my beige elasticated trousers and drive a Toyota Avensis. 1.8 petrol, auto and get a reasonable 40mpg.

I’ve not had it long enough to comment on reliability, 2nd hand 60 plate, but with £10k I’d be looking at Arius hybrid.

Nothing exciting especially in a world where 2ltr diesels are pushing 200bhp, but as confident as I can be I won’t be getting huge bills…

Many thanks for all the recommendations - I’m still not settled on exactly which way to go but as Estate cars seem to have been eclipsed by SUV’s of so many varieties I’m looking Japanese and probably SUV. Having had such a dog of a car I’m actually a little nervous to drop cash on another car for fear of another wig stretching belly ache. I know it’s a crap shoot and I will soon be putting my big boys pants on and taking the plunge. If anyone has any further experience / insight into the reliability of Japanese SUV’s (That will be subjected to heavy negligence) I’d love to hear more

Look at this on eBay

Low milage, brown seats, luxury motoring at its best.

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A banquet of brown - I’m unworthy

Are the seats adjustable? I can’t see you squeezing a @FatCuntTroller into that without excessive use of swarfega or a general anesthetic.

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No need, just pull the handle and slide the seat back, it’s very straightforward.


I have sage advice suggest the seats are not adjustable. Anyway it is tiny.


Nice, I can smell the interior from here.

I got static belts and palpitations at the same time - is this love?

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FTFY :wink:

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Nice price. Very reliable.

Looks abominable…


Or the Holy Grail.

Snow it doesn’t.


7 seater,just incase you have quadruplets;

Cheap and Cheerful.