The return of shit joke thread (incorporating the humour toilet) and mainly reposts of reposts of reposts


Took me a minute…








Went back to the doctor because it’s getting worse - now everything I eat comes out completely whole, undigested. if I eat an apple, I pass an apple. if I eat a pie, the entire pie comes out untouched.

Doctor says " that’s easy - eat shit"


Is this what Guantanamo was like?



The kind that spells centre 'rong :+1:


more bothered about what’s in the foreground :anguished:


Not the state of the cables? :wink:


well obviously that, I meant the upright cleaner thingy of course :rofl:


From my 12 year old grandson. Good lad.



A woman goes into a tattoo parlour to have images of her two favourite singers done on her upper thighs. After hours of work the artist is finished and the woman, flushed with pride, rushes into the street to show the works to the first person she encounters, a wino slumped in a doorway.
The woman lifts her skirt and shows the drunk her left thigh asking “Isn’t that the spitting image of Elvis?”. The tramp isn’t totally convinced, but says “Yeah sure.” She then shows her right thigh asking, “And isn’t that John Lennon?”
“I don’t know lady” complains the boozer, “But the guy in the middle with the beard and bad breath is definitely Willie Nelson.”


Explanation is simple - They are cat people.


Yes the symmetry is all to cock.


The TV would get in the way of the clock if you did that.