I had assumed that it would be Priti Awful.
Jan giggled for reasons…
To elaborate. Many years ago I bought her a petrol lawnmower for Christmas. It was a twat to start. The neighbour was heard to say "come in Jack (son), the “lady” is cutting the lawn.
About 5 years later she found out there was a battery start model. Fuck, did I get a bollocking!
So I bought her a Honda that has never been a problem.
Result!
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A lawn mower?
You old romantic, what are you getting her for Christmas?
An ironing board? 
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Haha my dad bought my mum a twin tub washing machine for her 21st.
Frankly it’s a miracle they’re still together 50 years later.
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The question is, is it still functioning? A decent one from back in those days it’s not out of the realm of possibility.
Not if she pushed it into the garden and set it on fire, shouting at him “Never mind the candles. Try blowing that out !”
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Well that’s not suspiciously specific or anything
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Just sayin’ …
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Yes, a good wife is for keeps.
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My ex-boss got his wife a dinner bell for xmas one year, so she could let the kids know when dinner was ready.
Funny, my family did the same for me.
We all feared for his life but apparently she quite liked it
I just start walking around the house loudly singing silly songs about what’s for tea, what they need to do (turn shit off, wash hands, help set table etc…)
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