For those of us who have never had a beard before this a perfect opportunity.
Pics and advice here please
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Buy some razors on tinterwebs 
Plastic surgery? 
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Don’t take any more selfies
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Manic times 
I briefly experimented recently. I don’t shave more than every 3-4 days anyway but coverage was uneven and so very grey. This morning, I broke out a fresh Feather blade and I type this entirely clean shaven.
I’m not wearing socks though. Fuck socks.
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Beards are a pain to start, but then dead easy. They are mostly itchy when they are irregular, so if you just leave it for a month to grow it’ll be really annoying. Better to trim regularly, increasing the setting each time if that’s what you want.
If you go long then you’ll need to manage the neck line and cheek line - the former will need to be shorter than the main beard, and the latter probably done with a razor. This is the main reason I keep my beard short.
For that I will need some trimmers.
I tried trimming the beard with my normal hair clippers set to 0.5 it wasn’t optimum!
Any suggestions on a budget to medium priced beard trimmer?
Your chin’s gone mouldy. 
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I bought a Remington La Barba based on reviews. It has good battery life and cuts a short beard well. It’s not great on longer settings, although I have no idea if others are better. Getting a clean cut on long settings is always going to be more difficult (read: need a better than budget offering).
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Philips Oneblade. Fucking ace.
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Hair modelled on Gollum?
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I had to Google that, and the answer is no
yep
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What, hair ? Oh, hang on, you’ve picked out ‘Gollum’. Hard to countenance.
VB
I cant help it if you cant read the one word I quoted in my response
Ozzy Ozbourne hasn’t aged well.
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Was it the quad bike accident or the substance abuse?
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