Load Your Head

If you could load your head with skills which otherwise take many years to learn what would it be and why?

In the film The Matrix Keanu Reeves loads his head with Kung Fu which is a good choice and would make my top five.

I want to play Hammond organ like Jon Lord so that’s what I’d choose.

Loading of skills would be via tape cassette with flashing blue/yellow stripes down the side and a screechy noise.


French, German, Spanish, Netherlandic, Chinese, Japanese, Russian and Dog modules.

Compulsion control module.

Extended Patience add-ons.

I’d want to load one that makes every recording stunning

  • Jiddu Krishnamurti enlightenment download

  • All the information ever written by man

  • How to make a portable Schumann wave generator

  • How to create more downloads for head

To take drugs and recover like when I was 25


How to understand women and 2 stroke engines


Where to find the best Ltd. Edition, coloured vinyl records.

Common sense.

How to swear in hieroglyphics.

How to be a top notch hypnotist.

Just make sure they’re not hot, or you’ll burn your hand

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An in-depth knowledge of foreign languages would be useful.
The ability the understand and manipulate the stock market.
The ability to ride a motorcycle like Valentino Rossi.
An understanding of electronics so I could build cool HiFi projects with my ill gotten gains from the stock market.
O and worlds best lover to satisfy the super model’s and actresses I’ll be dating again with the ill gotten gains from the stock markets.

That should cover it l reckon.

The really fast ones need constant lube and frequent rebores.


How to play the guitar.

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How to be president

  1. DIY and how to do it successfully.
  2. Patience
  3. As for 1 but about surgery.
  4. More patience

I am actually loading, now on here…

How to be a cunt :+1:


You’re already overqualified, as you’re only very slightly mentally deficient, not especially corrupt, barely delusional and so far as I can tell not even remotely bigoted…

You might need to be more American tho’…


The wonderful world of rebuilding rotary engines.

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MI5 used to do it to kids back in the 60’s, send them off on potentially fatal missions without a care.
Scandalous really.

Some hot R2R action in amongst this distressing footage.


And repetition, you will need to be an expert in repetition.

Did I mention repetition?

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I only really want to be better at the things I already do; Father, husband, tailor, audiofool. Knowing how to build amps would be cool…