Out of Office

Well it’s that time of year when I keep getting spammed by my colleagues out of office messages…

Any care to suggest some meat men style OOO messages?

I’m just here to see if Jim and Terry can resist locking a new thread and merging it into something else :popcorn:


The Out of Office thread is currently on annual leave, when I return I will be joining the Shit that doesn’t merit its own thread team.

I’m currently out of the office. You’d better get used to it as the cunts at the top have decided to outsource the whole department. Good luck getting whatever it is you wanted. You’re going to need it, given what I have seen so far from the new outsourcing “partner”.


that crossed my mind, but I thought I’d have a go

I like to rotate our customer service dept auto response

“Out taking manservant to Vet, if you have glue for sale or know of glue to steal please activate the bat ray”

“No response? Think old peoples home - We will be napping like champions between 2:30 and 4:30 Mon - Fri”

“If you have equipment to sell or exchange for sex please wait at the garden gate”



Not much gets past the thread consolidation bunnies these days.

Slightly off topic but my old mobile phone message was “Sorry I’m in at the moment please leave a message and I will call when I am out “

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Double meh!

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on commission and a piece rate I hear

Little point as I only get about 5 emails per day which are pretty much all internal, everyone knows I’m a moody twat who won’t answer emails at the best of times so a poncy OOO won’t make much difference.

Apologies, but I’m currently in Ibiza ravin, doing some serious shit and getting laid every four hours…fuck, sorry that was a flashback.

I’m actually in a mobility scooter on the sea front, and will be checking emails only occasionally.

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Cannot think of a more shining example of the dull, unimaginative fucker than a “witty” OOO reply.

Right up there with signs that read “You don’t have to be mad to work here, but it helps”. How tragically dull do you have to be to have one of those?

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The only place I’ve seen one of those ‘you don’t have to be crazy…’ signs used correctly and with humour was in the shop at Botton village in Yorkshire.