Have a lovely birthday Matt
Yep- MHR Matt have a great day
Many happy returns Matt ! Have a great day.
VB
Happy Birthday Matt. Make sure Stronzetto gives you a good deep hoof of the good glue.
Smart Motorways will not work with stupid drivers 
A Tuba will fit into a Skoda Fabia boot with the parcel shelf removed, just…
Ive just learned that having 2 threads with the word shit in the title looks a bit shit.
I’ve learned do not ever go for a dark coloured ceiling.
Ever.
…and I mean EVER.
“Experience keeps a dear school, but fools will learn in no other” - ancient wanky proverb
I always liked:
‘May your wheels go square and fester at the corners’.

Also learned that no amount of decorating, cutting in, log burner installation will lead to an increase in the likelihood of sex.
No sirree. Like painting in a nunnery.
I presume further coats of white ceiling paint will need to be applied.
La Spatchcock might beg to differ. The merest hint of eau de turpentine and she’d be putty in your hands.

A love palace if ever I saw one.
Maybe she’s good to go until she lies back, sees the ceiling, and for whatever reason anal springs to mind and then she cools off the idea?
Lies back? How quaint. ![]()
Lies back? How quaint.
I’m surprised you can remember…
If people on here are actually having sex I’m fucking flouncing
You mean while they’re typing?
If people on here are actually having sex I’m fucking flouncing
Get your frilly dress and high heels…