I tittered, it’s a cut above most on here😁
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You possibly need a day out.
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I could sort that for you. Or fuck something else up by accident.
Life’s a lottery 
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Yes, his Carer deserves a rest
Misspelling?
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An elderly woman decided she needed to bring back some excitement to the bedroom.
She burst in on her husband in bed one night wearing nothing but a red cape, thrust her arm in the air and shouted “Superfanny!”
He immediately sat up in bed, put on his glasses and after a little consideration he said “I’ll have the soup”
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That’s actually quite funny . Off with you.
Don’t encourage him 
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I have a suspicion you would enjoy reading ‘Becoming Jonny Vegas’. (In truth, it’s quite a sad tale about an alcoholic with borderline Schizophrenia who then gets paid for sharing that affliction with audiences for laughs).
But the above picture is very in keeping with some of his tales growing up…
Neo gothic.
Ostrogoth
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Tie me kangaroo down sport