Rage bait mince pie filling?
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Right first time! 
[I do actually have a candidate for that lined-up - and it’s one I sincerely like…]
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Pineapple?
Wot no ham?!
Tempted to get one. Save traipsing through fb for a car
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You rubbing that on a lamb roast?
Concocting your own Gentleman’s Relish perhaps?
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Probably more expensive to feed than a car 
There’s also the Kilimanjaro sized jobbies to contend with
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Cigar, sir 
Yep, I love ‘Patum Peperium’, but none of my usual supermarkets have had it in-stock recently and so I thought I’d try making some.
I want to give it 24 hours to mature before testing, but it certainly smells right, and this one will be a fair bit hotter than the shop version - plenty of lovely Kashmiri chill, mustard powder and white pepper gone in 
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Heh heh . . . Gentleman’s Relish . . . heh heh heh
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Are you just eyeballing and tasting, or keeping track of measurements so you can recreate it?
I am absolutely winging the fuck out of it.
Kinda how I do with all cooking.
Need to come at it cold tomorrow - got some nice wholegrain sourdough for toasting, so that’s breakfast sorted - I’ll know at the first mouthful how close I’ve got to where I want to be 
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Haha, exactly the way I cook, don’t think I’ve ever made a recipe the same way twice.
That’s why I do almost no baking, too scientific
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As soon as you are using any sort of animal products you can never just use weight. One fish might taste fishier than another so 50g of anchovies might add a completely different flavour profile from another 50g caught somewhere else. Unless it’s baking precise measurements in cooking doesn’t always work. They are guidelines, it’s all about how it tastes for me. Taste is also subjective though so basically it’s" a does it taste good right now?". Eat it now or hope it will taste as good or even better tomorrow.
Well this has been a fucking triumph - fishier, saltier, umami-er, spicier, tastier than the shop-bought
I’ve suspected that ‘Patum Peperium’ has been dumbed-down over the years compared to when I first got addicted in my teens, and now I’m sure. This homebrew blows it out of the water.
Next time I’m going to extend the spicing - bit more mace, alspice, chilli, pepper and ginger, and add nutmeg and cinnamon to the mix.
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FoL#1 brought some yesterday from our local Deli who says there won’t be any more. (Company closing?) I haven’t had it before & it’s pretty poky!. If it used to be more intense than this, it must’ve been quite something.
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I can see that it won’t be to modern tastes, it’s a genuinely old product. The idea is that you spread it very thinly, almost a smear.
I’m onto my second batch now - made twice as much, but I oversalted and underspiced it - Aleppo chilli is too mild. Still pretty damn nice! I really should figure out an actual recipe.
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I liked it when applied sparingly although I guess many nowadays wouldn’t. As part of a generation that grew up with various Shippams pastes, I’d have found this a far more exciting option had I known about it.
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I find it works better as a seasoning in sauces, stews etc. Brings a deep umami and depth of flavour.
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Pack lunch horror, I begged for it in the day
I usually use white miso paste for sauces/casserole type things. But I can see this would also work.
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