Grown men get moist about the Eurovision: 2017's lowpoint thread

I have been informed by Narelle that Eurovision is on tonight and I am required to watch.

If I am being forced to endure this drivel, I will be getting hideously drunk and offering my commentary.

I care not if you choose not get involved, however, if you choose to, please post with respect for the wonderful institution which is Eurovision :roll_eyes:

Make sure you are pissed out of your skull a good two hours before proceedings kick off!

This may just help a little bit.

Narelle is forcing you to watch…!!!

You’re just a puppet on a string…


Drink plenty of Water then lock yourself in the Loo.


Just watch the rugby now on on BT Sport you softie.

A bit of Eurovision-wank will make a nice change from all that feckin’ tedious prog-wank for you. :thumbsup:

Get on the metho early just in case though.


@OzzyOzzyOzzyOiOiOi As if, you’ll be pissed anyway :roll_eyes:


Expecting the UK to get 8 points off Ireland whilst the rest of Europe gives us nil points.

Personally,i think they should have made Farage sing this year.


I wouldn’t expect even Ireland to vote our way this time, given the trouble we are causing. Nil points.

I expect the Mail will make some tedious fucking headline out of it on Monday.

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My favourite Eurovision was about 25 years ago. At a mate’s in London, vodka and acid, TV turned down and jungle playing on the HiFi at full volume, distorting to fuck, chain smoking while playing poker. Those were the days.


Was that the Spanish entry,with the No1 song,Don’t lick my window pain?

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I can only promise to listen to 8 or 12 bars of most tunes (and perhaps bridge), before returning to listening and smoking.

You can tell pretty much what the rest of the song will be from that.

I am also being forced to adopt a full Julian Claryesque stylee*

*TBF this is my choice but I think it is appropriate.

Too easy. You don’t know Narelle, do you ? :grinning:

Troo dat.


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My tolerance to alcohol is high. So I have to make a special effort.

Just enjoy Eurovision for what it is - a complete fuck fest of european (and, now- Aussieopean) lunacy. Personally, I love it and haven’t missed a show for years. Mainly because, as suggested above, I get trolleyed, have a few silly bets, and enjoy the commentary ( I miss Terry W). I have started early with a couple of ales plus a small glass or two of rye. Once the rugby finishes I will cook some 24 hr marinated lamb chops, hit the red wine, get out the scoresheet and squint at the telly through blurred vision.

I don’t mind watching it It’s generally so bad it’s entertaining.
Wine does help

Like an alcoholic then?:smile:

You have a high tolerance for shit flute based twee noodle prog nonsense too then I notice.

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