Porridge wankery and other vileness (was Inspiring achievements)

Food & Drink
41

Stand by for the porridge Nazis :face_with_raised_eyebrow:

42

A bit of a strenuous/dangerous way of including salt in porridge but each to their own. :+1:

2 Likes
43

Inspiring achievements > wanking into porridge

You don’t get this on mumsnet

4 Likes
44

Porridge is the devils cock snot - foul stuff second only in deviltry to milk puddings - custard, rice pudding, tapioca, etc. All are Beelzebubs bum gravy after a heavy night down at the blue oyster bar. The rancid, fetid result of marrying wholesome ingredients like eggs, rice and sugar with cow tit squeezings.
JUST WRONG…

(* all in my opinion obviously which was formed from horrific school dinner abuse in the 70’s where custard was yellow water with lumps in)

1 Like
45

Surely a spurtle is the correct implement for porridge?

46

Pinhead oats

47

Not tried, why do you like them?

48

Being Scottish and by virtue of that fact among the few suitably qualified to pass judgement.

Made with half water half milk, served salty.

If you fear the salt for medical reasons only then jam may be used. But not to be mentioned lest a shunning takes place .

1 Like
49

Get all this porridge wankery to fuck.

Half a cup of Scott’s porage oats, half a cup of water and half a cup of milk - simmer and stir constantly with a wooden spoon in a pan for 5 mins. Add a bit more milk and salt when in the bowl.

No sugar / honey / fruit or any other bollocks.

Job done.

2 Likes
50

Scottish - correct about: EU membership and scenery.
Incorrect about: porridge

2 Likes
51

Still the most underrated blues player from the 60s. Amazed he wasn’t bigger

6 Likes
52

Yer maw takes it salty.

1 Like
53

I’m quarter Scottish and it should be sugar added only

I know these things

1 Like
54

@coco Porridge and Kippers is your ideal breakfast, right? :joy:

55

With mushrooms.

3 Likes
56

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Soz,off work bored

7 Likes
57

I am totally Scots and salt was the only thing you put on your porridge when I was young. Recently I have discovered vanilla flavoured organic oats. Yummy!

58

Wankery is right as porridge is the devil’s cum…:nauseated_face::nauseated_face::face_vomiting::face_vomiting:

1 Like
59

Mouthfeel. Totally different “chew” to them.

1 Like
60

I just looked them up, it takes 30 minutes to make porridge out of them! :sunglasses: