Whoosh.
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Horn and valve owners 
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Only 1 functional pair… The others still mostly exist in a cupboard, having been partially shredded by one of our foster pooches.
slightly fewer now that the “kept for gardening” knackered ones have gone - but yes, too many
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I love my daps
Daps is Bristolian for trainers.
Several pairs of these…
R.M.Williams Craftsman Comfort.
One piece leather or suede in different colours and uppers.
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Aren’t those what old ladies wear to go to the Co-op? 
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More specifically, daps are plimsolls.
Trainers are just trainers, or can be referred to by brand: Ave you seen ar mur’s new deedas?
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Close but no cigar…
Just realised. As this is the (hi-fi) ‘Emporium’, everything automatically costs twice what it would elsewhere.
Alpaca?
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Oh how we’ve missed you 
Oh hell yes 
I’m turning the arses into speakers 
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Do you have a Lego beard too?
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I’m so bored on this train that I decided to treat you all to a shoefie.
C&J Tetbury. They’re falling apart after years of fairly hard wear but haven’t quite given up the ghost.
Stripy City Twat socks by Sunspel.
One word.
Corduroy.
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