Have you got the soundtrack ?
VB
No, is it any good?
Having, then recovering from a targeted prostate biopsy. Thatâs the one where they do it under general anaesthetic and tunnel in from underneath rather than go the back door.
Ouch! I hope all the results are clear.
Taking the Christmas lights round the window down
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Looking at selfies taken while trying on new glasses frames this afternoon.
Hmm, shall I go for âwannabe architectâ, âwife poisonerâ or âobvious paedoâ.
Decisions, decisions.
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Go for the latter as they will fit right in with your shoes and cords! 
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Go for the paedo glasses. The bonus is nobody will ask you to babysit.
I feel your pain brother - popped into the opticians last week to see if they had the Wife-poisonining Paedophile Architect glasses Iâm looking-for and all I got was arrested.
Theyâve got their market segmentation all wrong 
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post up the pics and weâll gelp you decide
Whatever you do donât Hoogle âgelpâ. The urban dictionary entry is NSFW.
VB
thankfully I am not at work. I am lying on the sofa scratching my gelp
Pissed off at having to work my butt off and doing too much travelling on M6 and M1.
been waiting for days for someone to fit a cooker hood [ integrated] as i was not too keen on fitting a door to it . gave up in the end and managed to fit a nice wickes chimmey hood but it took me about 4 hours !!!
I have been shouting at a Dymo label printer.
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Still puzzled as to why you felt the need to edit âgash shoesâ to âshoesâ.
Could you be coming 'round to my way of thinking, and theyâre no longer âgashâ? Or maybe even âhmmm, I think Iâd look pretty good in thoseâ?
I didnât want to cause offence!
Iâm now swearing at Dominos pizza because 40 minutes apparently isnât long enough for them to even begin preparing my order.
Fucking fuck sakes. I donât even want it now.
Stop pouting, of course you do.