Audi R8


If you can fit in the back of a 911… :joy: :joy:


Just buy an R8. You were going to anyway.

Definitely better looking than the 911, has a proper engine in the right place… And it’s not a beetle.


But it’s an Audi :weary:


As along as it has the v10 that’s a moot point.


Can’t stretch to a V10


This is purely because they don’t work for long enough for you to be seen out and about being a cunt.


You still haven’t told us why?

Maybe if I google Audi R8 and post the naffest thing I can find, you might deign to respond :face_with_raised_eyebrow:


As others have pointed out, I don’t think that Mr Coco is approaching this correctly. He generally uses the 911 as a garden ornament and when he does drive it, he gets a speeding fine the size of the Brexit settlement. As such, I have the solution;

This is a completely shit car but that doesn’t matter because it isn’t going to move very often. When not moving, it does look quite nice. When it does move, it makes so much noise that Pete will think he’s doing 130mph when in fact he’s doing 11 so no speeding fines. It also has rear seats that could stand to take some corpulent men on a noisy 11mph drive to the Turan.

It’s so perfect, I’m in mind to text the seller and tell him Pete will be over later on.


You forgot to mention it has a Ferrari engine?


I believe that Ferrari ensured that Maserati were using rather than eating the crayons when they designed it but it isn’t used in like for like form in any Ferrari.




You missed off



I am trying to redress this.


Why what?


Coming up to 60k miles, pretty sure there is a mahoosive service due then, £3k-ish, maybe more.

Amazing how many Masers come up for sale around this mileage.


Yes but based on the distance it is likely to go, this won’t be a problem for Pete until about 2022.


A friend had a Quattroporte - the thing ate clutches every 10k.
Cost something like £6k every time!


That one is a full auto because I’ve thought of everything.


If you’d thought of everything you wouldn’t be recommending a car made out of corn flakes boxes and pieces of string. :rofl:


Fixed :slight_smile: