I am sure the girls are wonderful but did you have firm words regarding crimping and tart efforts? If this was purposeful to raise blood pressure in the infirm on here then Bravo.
Likewise.
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Who knows?
Crimping 
yes I should have explained and demonstrated this. I think they concluded that gravity would be sufficient to hold the lids in place. They also suffered from overfill if I’m being critical. There was only one tart topped with what looks like a silhouette of Krampus. The others are jam tarts 
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Christmas cake with cheese, loverly, sloshed down with port. Done with mince pies, it’s cake from here on in.
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3rd and 4th pie of the year. Morrisons, warmed, crème coagulée.
Pastry is fine, filling is way, way too sweet, verging on diabetes inducing, despite the clotted cream. Negligible clag. 5/10
Ruby is enthusiastic about them. She is an uneducated Scotchish idiot.
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There are other types of Scotchish?
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Watch it you fuckers…
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Calm down Brian.
I expect my PM box will be full of messages in the morning 
Worst kind of troll
Racist
**Don’t ever speak to me again
**Unless you want to buy something from me, when you will find me as nice as ninepence (and slightly creepy)
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Gingerish??
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That’s a given with Scotchish
True, although I will admit to being distracted from the fact by the bald ex-ginge brigade.
They still have ginge body hair, just not on their napper
Camouflaged you mean? I’m not game to probe for the ginge on the off-chance…
Hand delivered by meat man Guy today fresh from Boulangerie John. This most revered Pie of Pies requires deep meditative focus. During this reverie the pie spoke to me. It spoke of seduction of forbidden fruits and lustful allure. The voice purred as my loins stirred - In the mind garden this scenario looked a bit like this but it was a pie and I was wearing brushed felt.
9.5 out of 10 - ZEREO clagg, Excellent fruit, superior balance and superlative rustic presentation
Thank you John you win
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What was the half a point deducted for?
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Batwoman shat the mind garden? Although that would probably attract a bonus with certain tantric delusionists.
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0.5 deducted for not being able to snaffle them on my hands and knees directly inside the oven as the timer goes beep.
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It’s a miracle that survived some 36 hours in my possession without being eaten. It was only a lack of clotted cream (left at John’s) that stopped me.
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Rule 34 is I believe applicable to this notion. I think it’s the being on hands and knees that does it.
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What a difference a pie makes.
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