I take it you don’t like them. Even with an iced holly leaf decoration ?
Ye of little taste, what other buccal delight can be expelled from the facial orifice and mimic a squeezed blackhead or boil and yet taste so divine.
Mind needs disinfecting
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This morning I went to Gail’s Bakery. It’s a posh chain, mainly London I think, and their mince pies are rated highly. You do get change from a fiver for a flat white and mince pie, but not much.
I’ve said that I missed the way that the filling oozes a bit and goes sticky on the outside. The way that fillings have insufficient zing. Both of these are fixed with this mince pie.
Frankly, it’s fucking epic. I thought it looked a bit over done, but that’s just the Demerara sugar on top that crunches as you bite. The pastry is crumbly but not powdery. The filling is full of citrus and fruit flavours. It’s one of the best mince pies I’ve ever had.
I had wanted to get great results from visiting independent cafés - we’ve got loads of great ones in St Albans - but they have all been a bit disappointing. The only disappointment here is that it’s a chain, so you fuckers can get hold of these as well.
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What a shame. The opportunities to display unlimited amounts of schadenfreude have been snatched from under your nose.
that looks great can you drop off some on your way back from London?
£5 for a coffee and mince pie, saw you coming mate.
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There’s a Gail’s in St Albans 
next door The Boot?
Yep
I remember seeing it now when we were in the Boot a few weeks back…
To be fair, your nearest branch is the St Albans one, so there’s some schadenfreude to be had 
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the University Cheerleading squad have just sold me a homemade cake (browny - and rather nice it was too) I suggested they come back with some mince pies.
Quite so
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The Cradock Variation
What’s the difference between Fanny Cradock and a long run across fields and woods?
One’s a pant in the country…
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Indeed.
My father did quite a bit of electrical work for her when they lived in Hertfordshire.
I visited Dower House with him several times during school holidays when he had to look after me.
Only went inside the house once mind, sat out and waited in the van the other times.
She was drunk, terrifying and quite mental.
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The sweetest yet, just ridiculous, huge too. Over dusted, pastry too thick, filling a sort of apple and sultana jam. Too big, too sweet, sooo Starbucks. £1.69
The Heston ones then.
I got gently irritated with Tesco for having too much mixed packaging - makes the recycling a pain, but you get to see the actual product. The Heston ones come in a plain cardboard pack, better for recycling but you don’t see that they’re not actually mince pies at all.
Once over this (it took me a while), they taste very much of Xmas. The right sweetness, lingering spiciness, pleasant crunch and then more spice. I’ve eaten at a few of his restaurants, and these fit in: they are exceptionally crafted and get better as you progress through each mouthful.
A pleb like me preferred (in some ways…) the Hind’s Head to the Fat Duck: sure the latter is full of simply astonishing flavours, textures and experiences, but sometimes you just want a fucking great steak. With this, it’s lovely but I just want a great mince pie. This is a great spicy pastry with cool crunchy stuff on top.
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We had some different Heston ones a couple of years ago at a bake off when we tried to beat the world record…They were utter pants.