The shit that does merit its own thread


#1

My five year old daughter did a fucking massive shit yesterday. It’s hard to guess the exact length, partly due to the refractive nature of water, but about 10cm stuck above the water and easily 25cm below.

It was so majestic that I decided to look up large intestine sizes for kids, and hers is likely to be 73cm long, so basically she shat out half her colon. It’s equivalent to an adult doing an 80cm turd.

It was a proud father day, for sure.


#2

A post was merged into an existing topic: The shit that doesn’t merit its own thread (the resurrection)


#3

I have experience of this very thing, Amy our daughter used to have similiar award winning leavings.


#4

All good material for a future wedding speech


#5

I would have said that the internet is permanent and she could find this thread when she is old enough but pretty sure @TMC would have nuked it a few times before then.


#6

I imagine she’ll be over the moon when she finds out you posted this on a public forum :face_with_raised_eyebrow:


#7

This is peak AA. Jon, hit delete now, the mission statement (whatever the feck it was) has been fulfilled.

:sunglasses:


#8

#9

Not until we hear how it tasted.


#10

image


#11

That hit water and porcelain before it snapped off, fantastic effort


#12

Surely this should be the first thing new punters read on the landing page.


#13

#14

#15

Been there, tho it was a skanky pub bog sprayed in wd40 to stop the coke heads doing lines on the cistern.
I’d scored a dodgy one and 1 pint later I’m conning up with my bowels going down.
I relived the trainspoting scene, literally shitting Niagara falls for 30 minutes. I could hear people gagging as they took a piss outside the stall.
Finally finished and discovered a lack of TP, socks it was.

Spent the rest of the night tripping my tits off with a ring like a 1000 degree wizards sleeve and fucking cold feet.


#16

You paint such a beautiful picture…


#17

Its a life skill.


#18

#19

A post was merged into an existing topic: The shit that doesn’t merit its own thread (the resurrection)


#20

2 posts were merged into an existing topic: The shit that doesn’t merit its own thread (the resurrection)