Lets start with gulliver @rmsshipbroker
And apply da vinci principles
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Great idea. 
Letâs do it.
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TBF, my OCD wouldnât allow me to post my wrong measurements 
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and I donât give a flying fuck about mine, so the truth is all
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Used to be a 28" waist but bit of a fat bastard now at 32".
Damn you, middle aged spread!
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Last nightâs jaunt took me and patch looking for the haunted nuns cross house, which I couldnât find, so ended up walking past dartmoor prison instead
Documentary level fat.
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My 60lb life 
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Heâs a disgrace. Perfect example of Western first-world gluttony & excess.
I feel thoroughly ashamed.
My guilt is forcing me to to shovel down a bucket of pasta (with sauce) and half a bottle of redâŚ
Luckily my previous employers have forklifts and cranes available should I need to be removed from my house. 
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Mmmm, Antonov. I enjoy watching itâs little brothers land outside my office occasionally.
Is it delivering components for a new Coco hifi power supply?
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Would love to see something that big in action.
Iâll bet you say that to all the boys 
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Take off is the best. They seem to trundle along the runway until they have reached what looks like 50 mph and then inexplicably lift.
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